Daily Blessings

Throughout this fertility journey, no matter how much life has thrown at me, I will remember my blessings & affirmations each day.

Archive for the tag “bravelle”

Forward.

I’ve recovered from my slightly down, reflective state from yesterday. I’m now waiting for my husband to come home & grill me a cheeseburger. Mmm. AF is on the horizon, as the spotting started today. Also, the need for cheeseburgers usually means she’s coming soon.

On CD2 I’ll start the birth control pills again, for 1 month’s time. It is what it is. Not my favorite part of the cycle. Then we’ll start the lovenox, prednisone (this is a newbie) and the injectables. I’m glad that I won’t be on Menopur this cycle & that I’ll be starting with a low dose of Bravelle. My meds arrive in the mail in less than a week already. I always love getting packages in the mail, even if its full of needles.

My goal is to work on having more calm, zen time this month in preparation for the chaos ahead. My hubs will be working out of state for 3 weeks & I’ll have the alone time I need. I am planning to find a chiropractor in town and get adjusted at least once, as well as do the castor oil packs once AF is gone. I want to do everything I can to keep my blood flowing properly, since that is an ongoing issue.

Well, it’s dinner time. Always a highlight of my day…

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CD3 – Yet Another New Beginning

I realize I owe a update for where my last cycle stands. It was our first medicated / monitored cycle with the RE {Reproductive Endocrinologist}. Where I left off was in November after a few days of stimming. My e2 (estradiol) levels were a whopping 1500. My medication dosage was being backed off slowly, as to not overstimulate me. And by “overstimulate” I guess I don’t mean OHSS. Rather,  my doctor didn’t want me to produce more than 3 or so mature follicles by the end of my cycle since I said I wouldn’t “selectively reduce.”  That’s a whole other blog topic there.

So, my Bravelle was lowered & lowered again. And then my estrogen bottomed out.

It went from 1500 to 620 then to 217. Major FAIL. This all happened around a weekend. Now, I need to state that my RE’s office isn’t down the road from our house. It’s over an hour away. So for 6 days in a row, I drove back & forth to the office and the lab to figure out what was happening with this e2 level.

My medication was upped again to 1 Bravelle, then 2 Bravelle & 1 Menopur, then 2 B & 1 M. Lord Jesus, I could not wait until Monday came around to see what was happening on the ultrasound screen. Luckily, my husband was off for a 4 day weekend, so he was there to bear the brunt of the crazy with me,

Monday came & I prayed before the ultrasound (just as I did every time but once). I thought for sure that there would be nothing on the screen. That I had lost all my follies.

But they were in there!  A few huge ones & lots of other ones. I was shocked, relieved & very concerned all at once. With an estrodial level so low, how did I have all these follicles? Every mature follicle should produce about 200-300 (according to my own doctor’s stats) units of estrogen. Some doctors will say each should produce 100 units. Either way, my blood levels did not match what I was seeing on the screen. No one really had answers for me at this point, other than my e2 finally went back up to 590 & I was to trigger that night.

So my husband gave me my Lupron trigger & we did what we needed to do over the next few days, blindly hoping for the best. I started my regular supplements. A laundry list of hormones in pill forms, suppositories & patches. I had been doing my Lovenox injections every day since I started the stims, as well as my NeevoDHA, baby aspirin & folbic. It was a lot to remember. None of them I minded more than the Lovenox. It’s just such a bitch of a shot.

Well, we hoped for good news, but in my heart I sort of knew it wasn’t happening. The estrogen snafu threw me for a loop & I knew something there wasn’t right.

My hcg came back negative last Thursday, but it was expected. I had tested at home a few times beforehand, which originally I said I was not going to do. But in my heart, I needed to be mentally prepared for that news. When my nurse called, I did not cry. I was upset, but I had done my crying the days prior. I was ready to move on by this point. And I was happy to get a small break from the Lovenox to let my belly heal.

So today is CD3. AGAIN. It’s the same old song & dance, isn’t it? I wonder how many cycle day 3’s I’ve had since I started TTC? Surely there have been a lot.

I visited with my RE yesterday for a follow-up & to get a gameplan for the future. It seems like just yesterday when I was walking into their office for the first time, but over 4 months have come and gone. My next monitored cycle will happen in February, with the commencement of bcp’s after my January AF (menstrual cycle). If we want to, we can try naturally this month while we’re on vacation (mmm vacation sex), but that means dragging along the bag of goodies (progesterone, lovenox, etc).  As always, we’ll continue patience & see what the future holds.

 

 

 

Stimmin’ like a Villian

My dear friend AF finally arrived 8 days ago. I started my stims / injectables / whatever you want to call them (ovulation meds) on Friday. Oh and my other bff, Lovenox.

On my first scan Monday, the ultrasound tech said I had about 30 follies. There were a LOT. As I was laying back, relaxing with the wand of shame inside of me, I was looking at the u/s screen thinking… yep, that seems like a lot. My E2 levels came back at 714, which I was told was on the high side of normal (for a Time Intercourse TI cycle). So my medication was adjusted!

Today, Wednesday, my E2 levels came back at 1500. I had less follies this time, but they were growing nice & big. Mmm juicy. The nurse this evening said I had 4 that were 10mm or larger. I had about 15 follies total this time. Again, my dosage was adjusted (lowered). I started out on Menopur + Bravelle, and now am on 1/3 – 1/4 vial of Bravelle!

Them ovaries are a-workin’.

Friday is my next scan & we’re hoping for great results. Praying for great results…

Scatterbrained…

I have a bunch of scattered thoughts that I’m not sure amount to a any specific blog topic. But I just wanted to share a little of what is going on, especially since I haven’t written in awhile.

I can’t say for sure what CD (cycle day) I’m on. The HSG + femara cycle threw my body for a loop & I haven’t had a true period since. What I do know is that I’m glad to be off birth control! Let’s take a step back…

After I had my HSG, bloodwork, husband’s tests, etc. I had my follow-up with my RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist) to discuss his game plan for us. After discussing everything, he suggested a timed intercourse cycle with Bravelle & Menopur. I think “timed intercourse” is a silly phrase. I was just thrilled IUI or IVF wasn’t mentioned right off the bat. Although there wasn’t a real reason it would be, I was still nervous.

So the very same day, I was instructed to start my first birth control pill. THIS was not something I had planned on. Ever. Because of my past issues with lupus, autoimmune issues, clotting disorders, estrogen was always said to be a big no-no. What was this doctor thinking prescribing me birth control pills!?? The nurse said it was a low dose & I would only be on them for 3 weeks. They needed to make sure that when the time was right, they can control over my ovulation. They didn’t want me ovulating on my own, too early, etc. I was going to be monitored (ultrasounds + estradiol levels) basically every other day once I started my stims. I reluctantly agreed to the bcp’s because I DID see the big picture.

I encountered some resistence from my friends & husband when I told them about the protocol, understandably. I explained to one friend that nothing worth having comes easy. And TTC and all it involves is not always 100% comfortable. Things don’t always go as we have planned. So this was just a small step towards our miracle.

And it was a small step! I ended the birth control a few days ago. Other than a little nausea & some crazy sore boobs near the end, it was easy. Of course, hormones & emotions have been flying too… But that’s all part of the deal 🙂

On Friday, I have my visit to the Doc to get my baseline ultrasound, bloodwork, instructions on how to use my medicines & I start my injections (hopefully). I’ll also start my Lovenox on the same day.

In the middle of all of this, I had a birthday. It seemed to come & go mysteriously, leaving me at the ripe age of 31. Saying I am 31 is bizarre & feels foreign still. I don’t feel any different but know I am officially in my “thirties” now. Again, this is very strange. I’m happy to have made it this far & learned as much as I have. I’ve been through a lot of struggles which have made me a better person. A better 31 year old woman.

Today, I have an acupuncture appointment to get my “zen on.” I am also looking forward to some goodies coming in the mail 🙂 (a birthday present from a sweet friend, some items for my craft business, and some items for future baby) You have to look for the little blessings in life, every day. They’re not always going to be these huge, life changing miracles. I’ll be waiting for that type of blessing in 10 months.

Til next time…

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